Why the "People of Wal-Mart" analogy is ridiculous.

I can't believe I'm even forced to address this. How in God's name can you compare PeopleOfWalMart.com to MomDot.com and Trisha Haas' blog?

Let's start with the basics shall we? POWM is meant to be a mean spirited and funny blog. They didn't start the blog to set an example, talk about their favorite tuna packets, give quaint anecdotes about what little Joey said to Santa when he was sitting on his lap. They quite simply started the blog as a bit of fun and others found it funny. They aren't out there pitching to sponsors and sponsors (most sponsors anyway) don't look to them to be role models or act as spokespeople for their products. Quite simply it's meant to be the ultimate in snark. However, even as low brow as their version of comedy is, even they have the decency to mask the identities of their targets, especially minors.

On the other hand, momdot.com actively pitches sponsors, Trisha holds herself up as a model for the mommy blogging community and sponsors want to work with mommy bloggers for not only what societies preconceived notions of what a mom is (mom knows best and mom will never steer you wrong) and should be but because they also know, moms speak to other moms about what works for them.

The problem is, being a mean mommy is pretty much at odds as to what major corporations want in a spokes-mom. That's not to say a mom can't stand up for herself, or fight for what's right, or even lash out after having a bad experience whether it's at the mall or with a bottle of laundry detergent. However, when you delve into picking on children, people who look different than you, or picking on those who look different from what you're used to seeing in your small shitstick town it reeks of at best of jr. high school behavior and at worst intolerance and bigotry. Not really a good example for society at large much less mothers who are tasked with setting an example for their children, and if you have a popular parenting blog, for other moms out there.

On top of that, large corporations are interested in protecting their brands and when they have spokespeople that tarnish their brand then they typically jettison them off.

I do hope that clears up why the lunacy of this comparison is woefully inaccurate.

From the forum at drama(mom)dot.com

Blah, blah, blah.

I havent eaten in 4 days...maybe some chips and a glass a milk a day at the most. I have lost that pesky 5 pounds but not in a good way. I am fighting w/ my DH because i am so tired and hungry, but cant sleep or eat. He took us out to dinner and within 3 minutes of getting the food i was in the bathroom throwing it up.

I'm guessing you're fighting with your husband because he wants you to post an apology to end all of this. Wow, in the bathroom throwing up. Now you know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of your mean-spirited attacks.

im so sick of being judged. I preach and preach about being yourself but im thinking of taking it back. Dont be yourself, be whoever someone wants u to be and we can all be the same boring PR machine.

You're sick of being judged???? I have countless screen-shots of your posts that do nothing but judge others. If you don't friggin like it then don't do it to other people.

I cant put up pictures of charlotte, chris, myself or video without it being stolen. I cant put up shoutouts to bloggers w/o them being contacted and told not to talk to me. I am putting all of you at risk.

Oh please, no one cares about your family photos, they haven't been posted anywhere. However it's interesting how you're concerned about where photos of your family end up while you showed the families of those strangers you posted zero regard. And I can't even believe I am bothering to address this again but because there are no death threats no one is at risk.

i have some PR responsibilities but thats all im going to do. I have no idea if i will ever be the same person again because i only live in fear. I go between hope that the attorney will help and fear that i will have to mortgage my house to protect my blog.

The only thing you live in fear of is losing your sponsors. Please. There is no police report and if you had a lawyer I would have received a love note by now from him or her and this blog would have been removed. Also, no person in their right mind when given the choice between apologizing for something you did that was wrong and cruel or mortgaging your home would mortgage your home. Please.

I have already lost my christmas because all the money we had for it is now gone and then some. Charlottes only getting something because i have sams cards saved from that. And our families because of prizes i have won or reviews i have done.

See prior paragraph and substitute mortgaging home for paying for Christmas.

People are writing about me saying that its wrong that i have a subscription on my blog blah blah. I have it on there to keep people out and i thought it would be a great plugin to use. I am so sick of being judged, told what i can and cannot do w/ my own website, the "blogosphere" thinks it owns an interest in what you do online because they see your space, but they DONT.

See paragraph above that addresses being judged.

They dont know me, most have never met me, and most know nothing about me. But they have zero problems writing up a 2 page blog on why i am insincere and a terrible person because i blocked out my posts.

No, I have a 2 page blog not because you blocked your posts but because you wrote mean and horrible posts about underage teen girls complete with photos, orthodox jews, strangers in whirlpools, and the list goes on. Guess what, you've been cyber-bullying people for so long that it's finally caught up with you. I don't know you at all, I just know I've been the victim of people like you and decided to stand up. And when I stood up the others you've bullied in the past stood up, and others like me who wanted that anonymous 15 year old to have a voice stood up.

Seriously Trisha, have an Oprah moment would you? Learn from your mistakes. As opposed to crying about being the victim why not consider the feelings of all of the people you've victimized and apologize to them and explain to your readers why it's wrong to cyber-bully countless strangers. Why not seriously reflect upon your actions and how they affect others? If you really take the time to do that then you'll understand why the rest of us want a public apology, and if that apology comes this blog gets deleted. It's really that simple.

How very peculiar.

Why is it that someone who's hired her own crack team of lawyers (and met with them on a Sunday over a holiday weekend no less) would need to post a request on a source list for reporters today looking for lawyers specializing in cyber-bullying?

46)Summary: CyberStalking Victoms/Advocates Needed

Name: Trisha Haas

Category: Technology

Email: xxxxxx@momdot.com

Title:

Media Outlet: blogger

Specific Geographic Region: N

Region:

Deadline: 05:12pm EASTERN - 01 December

Query:

We are looking for victims (they can be anonymous) of cyberstalking to tell
their stories of being attacked by one or more people. Did you receive help with the law? Did you hire a lawyer? Did it end or is it ongoing? How did it make you feel and how do you feel about the laws on cyberstalking?

For advocates against it, we are looking to interview groups or lawyers about cyber harassment/stalking laws and ways to help out
victims online. We are especially interested in how it relates to bloggers that may come under fire for posts.

We are writing several articles.
Over the phone interviews also welcome.

Now a woman who is an advocate and specialist in cyber-bullying reached out to momdot to talk about it and she said she never got a response.

Now, if you hired a team of lawyers why wouldn't you interview your own attorneys? Oh, by the way, still waiting on that love note from that team of lawyers.

Bloggers supporting that unpleasant post.

Another mommy blogger was kind enough to go through the responses left on the "(fat)AirportPeople" blog and pull out those who are publicly supporting this post. For you mommy bloggers and sweepstakes folks here's a good list of blogs to avoid. Please post in the comments if you have additions or if you have reason that your blog should be removed.

The Morris Bunch
Mommy Goggles
www.3psinapod.com
3 Kids and Us
http://mommysquiettime.com
www.prettypinkchandelier.com
Southern Bellas Way to Save
www.princesshairstyles.com
Riding with Jessica
http://notsoaveragemama.com
Simply Being Mommy
www.mamamichie.com
Is it Monday Already?
My Silly Monkeys
Moody Mama Says
The Not so Blog
TheGreerfive.com
Kindred Spirits Thoughts
http://www.mswonka.com/

Open Thread

Apparently the very awesome thread about this matter was taken down at Online Sweepstakes so feel free to post here.

Opening permissions so you dont have to have a blogger account to comment but I'm sure that means all of the lemmings and sycophants will be visiting too.

New post from Momdot.com

I'm only going to respond to some excerpts from Trisha's post:

For 16 months now I have been a victim of cyber-stalking by two online strangers. I know I have yet to talk about it, but after some lengthy discussions with some (amazing) blog and community leaders, they believe that I should advocating against it and supporting others that go through it. I think thats a fabulous idea.

Again, as I have said over and over again. I have nothing to do with any of the people you keep bringing up and I expect you to issue a very public apology to them if you bring on the legal team you threaten.

I would also never continuously use any form of media to continuously attack the same person. For one, its illegal, and for two, I think it would make me look pathetic.

No she'd never do that, she'd just use one form of media to attack multiple strangers. Apparently she needs a new team of attorneys. It's not illegal, it's called free speech.

The current rumors going around are also advocated by these same people. I am a victim over and over and over again. Same story, same people. Look it up. You will find over a years worth of the same content, regurgitated monthly about me.

What rumors? You posted a mean blog with unedited photos of a teenage girl. That's not a rumor, that's a fact.

First lets start with some education..

Cyber-bullying is a term that is often misused online. Cyber-bullies are actually only between minors. Both parties have to be under the age of 18 and include multiple incidents of technology in attempt to cause someone physical or emotional harm. Its just like at school bullying, but online. Basically, you will know it if you see it.

Again, you need new attorneys. Cyber-bullying does not require both parties to be under the age of 18, just one. Google: Lori Drew.

Cyber-stalking includes these things:

• Malice
• Premeditation
• Repetition
• Distress
• Obsession
• Vendetta
• No Legitimate Purpose
• Personally Directed
• Disregarded Warnings to Stop
• Harassment

• 
  

The criteria for meeting cyberstalking claims are as follows (from the same wiki article Trisha quoted but did not source):

A number of key factors have been identified:

• False accusations. Many cyberstalkers try to damage the reputation of their victim and turn other people against them. They post false information about them on websites. They may set up their own websites, blogs or user pages for this purpose. They post allegations about the victim to newsgroups, chat rooms or other sites that allow public contributions, such as Wikipedia or Amazon.com.^[4]
• Attempts to gather information about the victim. Cyberstalkers may approach their victim's friends, family and work colleagues to obtain personal information. They may advertise for information on the Internet, or hire a private detective. They often will monitor the victim's online activities and attempt to trace their IP address in an effort to gather more information about their victims. ^[5]
• Encouraging others to harass the victim. Many cyberstalkers try to involve third parties in the harassment. They may claim the victim has harmed the stalker or his/her family in some way, or may post the victim's name and telephone number in order to encourage others to join the pursuit.
• False victimization. The cyberstalker will claim that the victim is harassing him/her. Bocij writes that this phenomenon has been noted in a number of well-known cases.
• Attacks on data and equipment. They may try to damage the victim's computer by sending viruses.
• Ordering goods and services. They order items or subscribe to magazines in the victim's name. These often involve subscriptions to pornography or ordering sex toys then having them delivered to the victim's workplace.
• Arranging to meet. Young people face a particularly high risk of having cyberstalkers try to set up meetings between them.^[6]
• 
  

Unfortunately for Trisha, none of my posts meet that criteria. And if she did even in fact meet with lawyers they would have told her that.

When I looked into an attorney a few months ago, most attorneys I was talking to really didn’t know what to do. Internet law is few and far in between. But this week I decided I was going about it the wrong way and I needed to embrace the community around me and see what info they could pass on to me. In doing so, I was able to be recommended right to media and blog attorneys that fellow large bloggers use on the net and had an appointment with them today.

Really? You had an appointment with a prominent media and blog attorney, on a Sunday over a holiday weekend, in Nowhere, Alabama?

Its to the point where its illegal. You are not allowed to contact someones work, family, friends, or business associates w/ slander and I am finally through with being a victim.

Slander? Are you kidding? I'm posting my opinion on your posts. Let's talk about slander shall we? To start howling about slander my posts need to be false. Unfortunately, none of what I stated is false. I wish it was. We could talk about that Alexa traffic post but of course my attorney would subpoena mr.webvisitsnow, those ebay records, and your hosting receords. Here you go if you need it, standards for online slander

We have also documented all IPs from every account created or used to input my email address into false places. If you would like a copy of these IPs to block from your blog so you don’t become a victim, let me know I will supply it.

She is opening herself up to a world of lawsuits, because she doesn't have a privacy policy or terms of service on momdot.com that indicates she may share IP addresses or other personally identifiable information with other web sites what she is doing is illegal. Furthermore, even if one was posted and she forced everyone currently on the site to accept the TOS and privacy policy it still wouldn't cover former visitors to the site. But your crack legal team told you that too huh?

We should be allowed to, in our own writing styles, talk about social commentary, political views, controversial topics, snark, or any other form of how we want without being subjected to fake accounts, attacks, harassment, and more. That is NOT freedom of speech. That is illegal.

Sorry, I posted a blog yesterday about freedom of speech, you're free to attack 15 year olds and hairy people in hot tubs and the rest of us are allowed to attack you for posting photos of them with cruel comments. It's not illegal, it's the 1st amendment.

How many of the “outraged” can tell me my daughters name? Tell me where I went to college? Tell me the past 5 posts I have put up about my family? Tell me what I like to do on the weekends? Whats my favorite book? My favorite band? Can anyone outside of regular readers answer those questions without looking them up?

Who cares, all I need to know is you are cyber-bullying teens. Do you think finding out what your favorite book is will make everyone say "Oh wow, she likes Chicken Soup for the Soul! That cyber-bullying post is A-OK by me!

I am taking a stand for you. For all of us. For everyone in the blogosphere that wants to write about their mother in law, their job, their neighbor, their kids, their husband, their sex life, their disease, their college years, their handicap, their true thoughts without fear of online assault. For everyone that wants to join groups they want to, be a part of what they want, to go to their site without someone telling them what they can and cannot do.

Sure you are. Just like you took a stand for that 15 year old, that orthodox jew, Mr. Mohawk dude, and that couple in the hot tub.

I will update as I can, but much of what I am doing legally will most likely be held back from any discussion I have online.

Yeah, that was predicted in a post I wrote this morning.

For the record, as a blogger, if I have offended someone to the point I feel like I need to remove content, then I will choose to do that. I don’t owe the “Internet” an apology for people coming to this spot. My opinions are not widely known as light and airy. But as it was, I did remove the offending material and there is nothing more I can do to set things “right”. I did what was asked and that should be the end. Anyone continuing after the posts were removed is merely advocating hate, not an issue.

No, you don't owe the "internet" an apology, you owe that girl an apology and until you publicly apologize and acknowledge why what you posted was wrong or your lawyers stop me I'm not going away. And for the record, if you have good attorneys they'll tell you it's cheaper and a lot easier to do just that.

Have your attorney send me a love note and they should send it to Google too, Google won't remove this blog without a court order and neither will I. Bring it on. I have no problem with it.

My crystal ball says...

So, this is how tomorrow is going to roll out. One momdot is going to claim she has gone to the police and filed a report, she'll then claim something along the lines of "The authorities have advised me not to discuss this matter in the public realm any further for my own safety." She may or may not password protect the original death threats post but a report or a report number won't be provided under the guise of "The authorities have advised..." blah blah blah.

Then we'll either get something along the lines of "But rest assured the authorities are working on it" or "The authorities have said it's probably nothing but better to be safe than sorry.". And of course the authorities will suggest she "keep her posts password protected". You heard it here first.

What are you, a rookie? Part 2

Part 1 of this post is the next entry down

A second comment left by Trisha at the DigitalMommy blog:

And to add to this (Sorry I hit send too soon!), I dont believe the threats are serious, but that doesn't mean I have to subject my content to copyright thieves right now or leave any more blog fodder for people who wont leave me alone. And at the same time, who's to say they are *not* serious, so I am taking baby steps.

Its a temporary solution that will allow me to formulate a long term plan that will not include leaving my blog or terminating my writing and keep my personal family photos and stories out of the limelight until I have made those decisions.

While an entertaining solution, its also quite obnoxious to have to individually approve people I have discussions with daily.

And hey, if people buy along the way, its total win/win.

~Trisha

I'm about to lay a two-fer down to illustrate exactly why this post reeks of rookie blogger, focusing on this statement:

that doesn't mean I have to subject my content to copyright thieves right now

First, please google "Fair Use" and get back to me about your copyright. Next visit the Wiki entry for "Streisand Effect" and get back to me about the countless views of that imageshack link of your mean spirited post about the scary "airport people" has already received.

So first the excuse is you have to password protect these posts because of death threats, now it's a copyright issue. The truth of the matter is you don't want sponsors to see those posts. This is now your 2nd excuse for password protecting these posts. I have news for you, I have a mailbox FULL of screen shots of mean spirited posts that have been sent to me from almost a dozen bloggers. Guess what? You've got moles with passwords too.

No one has taken your personal family photos and stories and posted them anywhere, actually they are the few posts in your blog in which you might seem like you have a slight glimmer of a soul. The issue is taken with your very mean spirited posts of strangers complete with unauthorized photos. However, I am curious. Suddenly YOUR family photos are off limits while you posting photos of other people's families is not? Tsk, Tsk.

An "entertaining" solution? To death threats? Really? So wait, I'm confused. Do you need to buy a security system for all of those threats that you yourself claim:

I dont believe the threats are serious

They are were serious enough for you to write a post about all the ones you claim to be getting, lock down your site, and ramble on about buying a security system but not serious enough that they could wait to be reported to authorities on Monday? Or wait, is it your copyright that you are worried about? Man, I can't keep it all straight!

Let me know when you have that report number.

What are you, a rookie? Part 1

DigitalMommy posted earlier this evening about Momdot.com's move to a subscription based model (in the wake of claims of death threats) applauding the move, you can find that post here:

Digital Mommy

I have to disagree with her assessment that it's a clever scheme but that's not really the point of this post. I wanted to respond to the two comments from the Momdot.com founder left on that blog:

trisha said...

First, thanks for the traffic. Second, I wont shut my blog down over people that have been sending me threat emails this week. I have gone through worse w/ the PR blackout.

Instead, I put it on private and will be going to the police on monday. I have been blogging for over a year and a half, am a speaker at a past conference and an upcoming one, and my blog is monetized, meaning I make enough money from it that its income based.

Shutting it down would be like quitting your job. Its not going to happen, but i took steps to protect my personal posts until I have done taken the legal steps to protect myself. I have been on the web for 5 years and my information isnt going anywhere online, even if the blog did. I am instead faced to change how I do business in the temporary fashion.

For the record, I thought it was smart to put it on a pay system.

Trisha

So first off, no one asked you to shut down your blog. I don't really care what you do with your blog provided you don't cyberbully any more underage teen girls. No one ever made this about shutting down your blog, it's about not being such a mean person. I have no kids, so I have no interest in reading an electronic hamster review. Ultimately, I really couldn't care less if you wrote about electric hamsters and your entire blog ultimately ended up devoted to it. Specialty blogging, nice niche.

Threat emails? Interesting. You do know it would be ridiculously easy to track down who was sending the threats? Very easy to get the IP addresses on emails and another thing, you do realize the first thing the police will do is pull those IPs and pull your ISP records...Just food for thought if maybe you fabricated them.

You claim you got death threats but it can wait until Monday? You posted a whole blog about your death threats and buying a new security system but notifying the police can wait until Monday? Yeah, maybe you can do that on the way to Winn Dixie if it doesn't take up too much of your time.

Monetized does not mean you make enough money that is income based, monetized simply means your blog is set up to make money via advertising and other sources. Whoopie. There is a tab at the top of this blog in the editor that says "monetize" I could monetize this blog but it doesnt mean I'd make enough to mean squat.

And of course you thought it was smart to put it on a pay system, not really surprising at all.

On the first amendement and freedom of speech.

I noticed in MomDot.com's "poor me I am password protecting everything" blog she goes on about the First Amendment, she even posted a cheesy bumper sticker that reads "I [heart] the First Amendment". Every time someone like her, or someone equally as brainy like Carrie Prejean, rambles on about their First Amendment rights I am in tears laughing. First off let's post it here:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

I'm a bit behind in the news but I don't recall hearing about Congress proposing a Trisha Haas can't speak freely law. Yes, under the First Amendment she has the right to post photos with cruel captions, and under the First Amendment I have the right to talk about what a mean and nasty blog it is. Others also have the right to talk about what a mean and nasty blog it is, that's how the First Amendment works...we ALL have the right to speak.

Trisha is not being attacked for exercising her right to free speech, she is being attacked because the content she has posted (and not limited to that post alone) reeks of Junior High School bullying.

So does she have the right to continue posting and producing "mean" content? She does, so does the Klan for that matter. Is she within the bounds of the laws of the State of Alabama? Yes, but just to provide a reference point, it's also legal to marry your sister in Alabama (Code of Alabama Section 30-1-3). Is she within the bounds of plain human decency and compassion? No. Not by a long shot.

Throwing down the gauntlet.

Trisha is about as predictable as a clock. I figured her pride and ego would not allow her to remove the offensive post and apologize. I also knew that there were enough offensive other posts that could be potentially damaging if seen by her sponsors. Knowing that there is a campaign contacting her sponsors, I was trying to figure out how she would remove the offensive posts while still saving face. However, I have to admit I didn't figure she was so over the top that she'd claim a fake death threat to do it. From MomDot.com:

MomDot has always been a blog that helps bloggers, companies, and each other. We are also known for controversial subjects. Up until recently, the community has been able to withstand critics. All things considered, the majority of our visitors are quite mature, whether they agree or not.

But this week I have personally received death threats and some of the forum members are receiving threats of assault and more for just belonging to this group.

Its a big world.

We are not out there forcing our opinions on anyone. You have to either show up or subscribe to read, which of course is an optional decision. This is one blog in a sea of millions that create content that others don’t agree with and also one of the smaller blogs on the net regarding controversy. Let me remind you that the opinion that we are “mean” over “controversial” depends on which side you are on. If you are on the side that agrees with the material, its controversial. If you play defense, its “mean”. Either way its our right to run this blog how we see fit and produce “mean” content.

For now, in an effort to protect my family from being killed, or threatened to be killed, over freedom of speech, my family posts and videos will be private from this point on. Which is actually kinda awesome because there have been many subjects I haven’t touched before and now I will feel more comfortable branching out.

General readers will still have access to a good majority of free content, but if you are an avid reader/commenter and would like a FREE upgrade to Member Status or you advertise momdot on your blog (like in a banner), please check this page to find out if you qualify to view our private posts. We want you to continue reading and will work with you if you have been a part of us.

Make sure you register for a FREE membership before filling out the upgrade info.

All other visitors will need to upgrade by a paid subscription. If you are going to harass us, you can now pay for my house security system.

~Trisha

P.S. Suck it.

So, I am throwing down the gauntlet on this. Death threats are VERY serious. If I, or my family were threatened, the first thing I would do is not write a blog but call the police. But again, I am 99.9% certain that her claims of death threats are just an excuse to hide posts that would be offensive to sponsors without losing face. So I offer Trisha a challenge, if she provides a police report or a report number showing that she has in fact reported these threats to the authorities, I will reveal my identity. That simple. However, I'd like to make a couple of points:

1. Filing a false police report in Alabama is illegal, you can reference Alabama title 13A-10-9 False Reporting to Law Enforcement Authorities. Under 13A-10-9 the penalty is up to a year in jail. So Trisha, if you file a false report and don't have the emails or phone records to back it up you could go to jail.

2. She could also make up a police report and/or report number but I could (and plan to so that I can verify) order a copy of the report. Would be very simple to prove it a fake report.

3. I might also consider a receipt for you getting your security system installed as proof but again, I am almost 100% certain you aren't getting one. Haven't you claimed you've gotten death threats in the past? So why didn't you have a security system prior to this? Or were those not really death threats, just calls from telemarketers?

So Trisha, it's pretty much win/win for me. I'm not a blogger so I have nothing to lose.

PS: Suck it.

Check out the Online-Sweepstakes members!

I was directed to this thread by one of the "white hat" bloggers on the right side of this issue and there is a pretty amazing thread from the sweeping community who all seem appalled by Trisha Haas' Momdot.com blog.

The whole thread can be found here:

Online-Sweepstakes

However, two comments really stood out:

Originally Posted by lonestargoodies

Would you move on or would you continue talking about it for days? I don't like to dwell on negative things. If something really has a negative effect on me then I move on.

Response from sunshine3331

I think everybody is just trying to stop momdot from having a negative effect on humanity.

Ok, the response is brilliant!

But this one really hit a nerve:

Originally Posted by lizdehart
Trisha Hass won $10,000 for charity. Why?

By caring what kids think about themselves.

Quote:

Health Esteem, Self-esteem Program – iNGENIOUS LeadHer: Trisha Haas, MomDot; contributor, Stefanie- Bloggymommy3 http://mommysquiettime.com/. Our visitors strongly believe that their children are lacking major self esteems issues. Not only in their personal households, but in life in general.

Because making kids feel good about themselves by berating them is the right thing to do.

Quote:

Self esteem and Health Esteem comes from three major sources: 1) Family 2) Friend and Educational Influences 3) Media (tv, internet, magazines)

A blog is media. Hmmmm......

Quote:

The site would also have positive articles about extracurricular activities, eating right, and problem solving for kids from every age. There would also be a panel of children, to rotate out every quarter, that helped speak with children directly about situations they had in their lives, much like a virtual big sister and big brother program. As part of the site, we would like to see some positive education aimed at parents as well so they can raise more positive children.

Unlike Trisha's own website: "This girl needs to lay of the ho-ho's before she ends up one someones blog..... Oh. Too late."

iRobot, I am sure you have a social media coordinator and I'll bet you have a google alert set up for iRobot so I am guessing at some point you'll see this blog. How is it possible you let a woman who has now posted 3 different photos of minors mocking and criticizing them win a LeadHer contest for promoting self-esteem in children while at the same time posting trash like this:

Screen shot of momdot.com's post mocking a 15 yr old


iRobot, you'll be getting an email from me soon.

Screenshot of Momdot.com blog that started it all.

Now that Trish Haas' post mocking a 15 year old (www.momdot.com/airportpeople) has been put under password protection I have a screenshot here of it available to anyone who needs it. I advise in your letters to PR companies that you please include the link to the actual photo and not this blog (and please tell them they will need to click on the photo so it enlarges to full size). The link is an imageshack link but feel free to repost it as needed.

Imageshack Airport People Post - Momdot.com


Enjoy!

On standing up and ethical blogging.

I know some of you have issue with my methods, and that's understandable, I've been struggling with it myself after I released my anger in my first few posts. The biggest issue I have with Momdot.com and Trisha Haas is again, this is not a one time mistake. Searching through her blog I found countless examples of her mocking people she deemed inferior to her. What I have a larger issue with is her including photos of these people in her posts. These people all have family, friends, and most importantly feelings. Does it seem that far fetched that any of these people, or their families, or friends might come across these posts? Is it likely they'll feel humiliated or embarrassed? Has it occurred to her that I might be one of the people in her posts, or maybe it's one of my family members or friends?

Trisha seems to have bullying down to a science. Target a person, prey on their insecurities and vulnerabilities, then get their clique to all chime in validating their initial observations and perpetuating the cycle. The cycle can be broken only when people stand up and say "This is not OK". The thing that Trisha fails to recognize is that we are all imperfect, we all have insecurities and vulnerabilities, and that includes her. If she doesn't want others to exploit her weaknesses and vulnerabilities then why do the same to others? It's cruel and the hallmark of someone woefully insecure and spiteful.

So is ethical blogging simply being FTC compliant? It's not, although full disclosure should be mandatory in the instance of product reviews, ethical blogging should be more than that. Many of you bloggers from all walks of specialty have the responsibility to set an example. When you behave in a manner that you wouldn't want to be treated in you send a message that it's OK and "fun" to be cruel to people and that's just not right. It has nothing to do with being PC and everything to do with being a decent human being. More importantly for you mommy bloggers, aside from setting an example for your followers, you should be conscious of setting a good example for your children. Just remember, all of the banks and brokerage houses are FTC & FDIC compliant but they bankrupted the economy, jacked up rates to force people into foreclosure and bankruptcy, and ruined many people's lives. Are they compliant based on the laws and regulations? Yes. Are these actions ethical? No.

That being said, I want to point readers to blogs that I have a great deal of respect for in handling this topic. Although I might continue to fight fire with fire, they are handling it in a manner that should be the standard for blogging and I applaud them for being brave enough to stand up and say enough to this sort of unethical blogging:

She's More Than A Number

Autie at More Than a Number has started a petition to speak out against Trish's cyberbullying of a teenager and urge sponsors to drop their support of Momdot.com. I urge you all to please sign the petition and include the signature link when you email sponsors and PR companies. The petition can be found here:

Momdot Petition

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NetworkingWitches

One of the first bloggers to tackle this issue and stand up, amazing!


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MonkeyMayhem

A beautiful girl with a beautiful blog!


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DelTheDad

He knew and dealt with the mean-spiritedness of Trisha and the whole momdot.com crew long before Trisha's "airport people" post.

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MyLooneyVerse

Another blogger to stand up early against Trisha's cyberbullying.

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If I have missed your blog please feel free to post it in the comments and I will add it to this list.

Hit 'em where it hurts...

Courtesy of mommygoggles.com I've come across an amazing list of PR companies that are the backbone of the mommy blogger swag machine. The only way to really make bloggers accountable is to cut off their supplies. If you have issue with Trisha's and MomDot.com's attack on a 15 year old girl please click through the links below and start writing PR companies who work for the corporations to find the bloggers to support their client's goods and services...

Hill & Knowlton
BHImpact
GolinHarris
Freeman PR
Litzky PR
Felishman-Hiller
New Media Strategies
Polliwalks
MWW Group
Rocket XL
Trainer Comm
Zazzle
Click Communications
Edelman
Kid Stuff PR
Fleishman
EuroRSCG
Malley Hansen Communications
Weber Shandwick
Zoloco Group
Cohn & Wolfe
The Rogers Group
Allison PR
Mom Central
Peek Inc.
Ketchum
Vistaprint
Walt
Fleishman for Hallmark
EuroRSCG for Sears
Malley Hansen Communications for Sara Lee
Coyne Public Relations for General Mills
Weber Shandwick & Rocket XL for Wisk
Zoloco Group for Frito Lay
Cohn & Wolfe for Smucker’s


Also to note, from Trisha's own blog:

Maria Bailey at MomSelect
MomCentral
MomTV (Steph)
Victoria from RocketXL

Just for clarification.

Apparently the ever so cliquey group of lemmings from the conclave of Momdot.com followers seem to have a few issues/misconceptions about me and my purpose for starting this blog.

First and foremost, I am not a blogger. I have nothing to do with mommy blogs, blogging, etc. I am a member of a few message boards but seeing as how I'm not a mother or a blogger (or a father for that matter) sorry, I have nothing to do with your world. What's really astonishing to me though is that you vapid twits can't grasp that people who have a soul and a conscious have issue with the post that inspired this blog. It is wrong to post a photo of a minor and mock her in the way Trisha did, period. So for you idiots not to grasp why people outside of your microcosm of "mommy blogging" have issue with this it shows how completely clique-ish and out of touch with parenting you and your pals are. By the way, I really don't like cliques either.

Number 2: There are quite a few calls for me to reveal my identity...why? Revealing my identity would mean zero to you. You wouldn't recognize my name, you wouldn't find my blog because I don't have one but googling my name you'd find my myspace, my facebook, and that's pretty much it. Both my myspace and facebook are private so you wouldn't get very far with that. I have zero vested interest in the blogging community so I don't care if I piss off the momdot.com clique. You ask me to reveal my identity but I ask you why the hell would you put so much of your own personal information online? That's either just plain stupid or narcissistic or a little bit of both. The way some of you people blog it's like you're trying out for a reality tv show while at the same time doing your own commercials.

Number 3: Apparently, based on twitter, you guys think I'm either DelTheDad or aordinarylife. I can't really say anything to that other than no I'm not. I've never heard the names/blogs DelTheDad or aordinarylife until yesterday however, I am getting a pretty fast crash course in the world of mommy blogging and what I am seeing from a prominent minority of you is a bitter, nasty, unethical bunch who are more interested in circling the wagons and protecting their own (and their freebies) rather than accepting that one of their fellow bloggers made a huge mistake by posting a photo of a 15 year old and mocking her.

Number 4: Trisha's post mocking the people in the airport was shitty, but after I cruised her blog I found countless examples of that sort of shittyness. Had I found a blogger that simply made a mistake, a one time event, I wouldn't have created this blog. Instead I found a pattern of mean spirited posts from her and her sycophantic crew, I then chose to speak out as I saw so many post actually defending this high school trash. Defending her posts as obesity awareness? So what grand and noble cause were the other 3 photos raising awareness for?

Number 5: I also see a pattern of you momdotters going on and on about how I and others are jealous. Jealous of what? What a joke. Jealous of your free diapers? Jealous of having to pimp my family out online to get free ham and potatoes at a Sam's Club tasting? Jealous of being a slave to a blog and sharing every single minutia of my life with a bunch of strangers? There is nothing to be jealous of, I can assure you I have a much more interesting and fulfilling life than the whole lot of you. If I wanted to post mean-spirited photos of 15 year olds then buy 100K visits on ebay from webvisitsnow.com to fluff up some blog stats to get free canned Hormel luncheon meat I would, as astonishing as it may seem to those of you relishing in that sort of life, I have no interest in it.

And finally, this blog will go on, nitpicking Trisha Haas and the clique of momdot.com bloggers until either I get bored (however after looking at her and other momdot.com blogs it looks like I have tons of material to work with) or Trisha removes the offensive post, publicly apologizes, and sets an example for her minions by admitting her mistake AND acknowledging why it is wrong to post uncensored photos of minors (it would also be nice if she just stopped mocking anyone that doesnt look like they're from Shitstick, Alabama). By the way, besides not liking cliques I don't like mean cliques even more.

Sorry momdot.com bloggers, the bottom line is I don't blog, I don't write reviews, I don't get free diapers from companies in exchange for reviews so I don't give a shit about pissing any of you shallow cliquey twits off.

The sordid underbelly of mommy bloggers.

Required reading with a shout out to Del The Dad:


The Sordid Underbelly of Momdot.com


Juicy stuff, happy reading!

Trisha Haas shows up & lets her Alabama hang out.

Trisha Haas sure is spending a lot of time defending her web-stats which leads me to believe, especially after finding out she bought a traffic service for MomDot.com that she doth protest too much:



Dumbass huh? What do you think Compete.com is? A shittier version of Alexa with a toolbar.

Here's a link to the compete.com toolbar (moron)

http://tools.compete.com/

Here's a link to how compete.com gathers their data (moron)

http://www.compete.com/resources/methodology/

Here's some details on compete.com's methodology (moron)

Compete manages the largest panel of its kind in the industry, combining the online behaviors and attitudes from 2 million consumers across the United States. Our online panel is comprised of a statistically representative cross-section of consumers who have given permission to have their internet clickstream behaviors and opt-in survey responses analyzed anonymously as a new source of marketing research. The Compete panel is several times larger than traditional panels, which means that we help clients measure and benefit from more insights.

Here's a damn FLOWCHART showing how compete.com gathers their data (moron):

And finally, from the Alexa site here's how their data is gathered: (moron)


Alexa Traffic Rankings

Alexa's traffic rankings are based on the usage patterns of Alexa Toolbar users and data collected from other, diverse sources over a rolling 3 month period. A site's ranking is based on a combined measure of reach and pageviews. Reach is determined by the number of unique Alexa users who visit a site on a given day. Pageviews are the total number of Alexa user URL requests for a site. However, multiple requests for the same URL on the same day by the same user are counted as a single pageview. The site with the highest combination of users and pageviews is ranked #1.

As for the rest of the rant, I will post all I want about you...you seem to think it's just fine to post whatever trash you like about people. And you wont defend my posts any more because you can't, your actions are indefensible.

You would be a pro at haters as your Momdot.com is nothing but hate and whoring yourselves for free cruises and diapers.

More proof of Trisha Haas' February /March Traffic

Man, you can post your own shiny graph on your website but Alexa is the gold standard of web traffic analysis.

Based on Alexa's report from early 2009, at the beginning of the year her traffic ranking plummeted to ranked of over #90,000. Boom, February comes along (when she bought 100,000 hits from webvisitsnow.com) and presto, within a month she jumps up to #20,000...by the end of March her rank is just north of #20,000 then a month later (presumably when her 100K views are up) she drops to below #40,000 before she starts climbing again.

She can post whatever little graphs she wants but Alexa doesnt lie...This is completely different than the graph she posted in her blog.

Momdot post debunked

Momdot claims the following here:

Momdot post re: website traffic

She claims:

Yes, in Feb 2009 I did purchase traffic. But not for momdot.

In fact, here is momdots traffic for Feb. You can tell it didn’t go up till this summer right about the blackout and we got like insane advertising throughout the country. In fact, it appears to have gone DOWN in feb.

I am an owner of a boutique and right after Christmas it got super slow last year and I bought some web traffic to go towards my boutique. Simply put, people don’t purchase from like Jan-Feb and it was my sole income.

Yet Alexa shows a completely different story and shows her momdot.com traffic spike of over 50% shortly after purchasing WebVisitorsNow (pull the yearly stats):

Alexa analysis of Momdot.com

While the traffic to www.bambinaballerina.com remained completely stagnant.

Alexa analysis of BambinaBallerina.com

Inspired? Perhaps...

THIS ONE gets to me. This woman is approximately 31.

She could in fact be older.

She has a false yellowed tooth, yellowed teeth, blah blah, but she has nasty teeth and gums. Why are adults letting their teeth get THIS nasty? It’s not like she can't buy toothpaste.

WTF is the excuse for this?

If someone responds and tells me she has a genetic problem, Im going to hurl on myself.

This girl needs to lay off the ho-ho’s before she ends up on someones blog…

oh…

too late.

From a 1-800 dentist.com contest in which Trisha is a contestant:

Link here with quotes below:

Trisha Haas' 1800Dentist.com entry

Trisha H - Theodore, Alabama

How does your smile make you feel now?

While I am blessed to have most of my teeth in my mouth, I can't say that it will be like that forever unless I get real help. I don't want to be someone that has dentures or has to put implants in. I want to develop and fix the problems, once and for all, and be able to stop covering up who I am. I want the outside to match the inside - a happy person.

Sweetie, the outside DOES match the inside. Ugly posts about children you deem fat and others you feel it's appropriate to mock. What's your excuse? How did you let your teeth get so damn nasty? Can you not afford toothpaste? Do you brush your teeth with your finger? You blame braces for your receding gums and stains? If you had brushed your teeth you wouldn't have infected gums or brown teeth. Braces don't cause your nasty, infected, receding gums, lack of care does. And you mock other people when your teeth are so foul? I'd be stunned if your husband still kisses you with an open mouth? Three filings in your front teeth alone??? Yeah, that's not genetic...that's just foul hygene.

What is the first thing you plan to do once you have your beautiful smile?
Buy red lipstick!! I can't wear it because it accentuates the yellow in my teeth even MORE! Get family photos with my daughter and husband - both whom have perfect teeth.

Honey, the first thing you should do is buy some new clothes. Really, dressed like Madonna circa 1986 to enter a 1800Dentist.com contest? You're a good 20 years out of style.

Post #2

Is MomDot padding their web traffic?

In trying to seek out more information on momdot and Trisha Haas I came across her Bambina Ballerina ebay listings. I noticed feedback left for her as a buyer from a company called webvisitiorsnow.com back in February of this year. What does webvisitorsnow.com do you ask?

Quite simply, based on what their ebay listings are for a mere $42.00 they guarantee 100,000 visits to your web site. Now, considering how courted bloggers are by big corporations why would you need/want to fluff your numbers by paying for fake traffic? Quite simply you want free stuff and you want to generate money from ad traffic. Corporations want to see traffic through your blog before they start doling out their free goods and if you are only getting a few hundred or few thousand visits per month what a simple way to pad your traffic and guarantee you end up on the top bloggers lists.

Now the evidence is circumstantial but seems pretty clear to me that if you're buying from webvisitorsnow.com you are desperate for internet traffic. Interesting turn of events considering ModDot's so called ethical blogger policy.

Links below:

Bambina Ballerina Feedback as an Ebay buyer

webvisitorsnow.com ebay listings

Post #1

Is Trisha Haas really that mean spirited?

This morning I came across the momdot blog and was pretty much mortified by what I saw. Trailer trash from Alabama basically skewering everyone and everything as if she were a maven of style and culture with her daughter thrown in from time to time as a footnote just to keep in the spirit of "mommy" blogging. Vogue, watch out!

Anyone who looks to her mommy blog doesnt really find many parenting tips, or many cute colloquial stories about her parenting experiences...they essentially find a run of the mill parent, blogs about banal vacation destinations (Universal Studios, Medieval Times, The Biltmore, Disney, cruises), some good and some bad parenting skills (hey, we just went to the dentist, you have no cavities so here's a chocolate bar), coupled with what appears to be a small town girl drunk on the "fame" of her 3500 followers on twitter. Those 3500 followers are about half the population of the town in Alabama she lives in so no wonder she feels as if her opinion, and venom, are the end all be all. It's a bit like being a cheerleader in high school I suppose, in your microcosm of the world you are top of the heap but out in the real world you're just another high school kid working at McDonald's.

But what drove me to start this blog was Trisha Haas' recent airport photo montage post. After her disclaimer:

This is your fair warning that this post may piss you off if you are a sensitive whiny baby that doesn’t like a dose of reality that isn’t sugar coated in political correctness.

She goes on to post photos mocking people, one of a Hasidim in traditional garb for no other reason seemingly other than oh, he looks different and is wearing a funny hat. Fine, you live in a small town and probably aren't familiar with arugula either but if you visit New York or many other major metropolitan cities you'd see Hasidim quite frequently. Chalk that photo post up to ignorance and perhaps a little southern bigotry and let's move on.

Next up an older man (looks like he could possibly be former military) with a mohawk. She suggests it could be a midlife crisis, I suggest Mr. Mohawk has probably lived a more interesting life over the course of a week than she has in her entire life of being a mom in a city where the median income is a measly $33K a year. OK fine, it's the internet...make fun of people all you want, post photos of people you don't know without their knowledge or approval to make yourself feel less insecure.

However, here is where I drew the line. In this blog there are not one but two photos of girls who appear to be minors. Fortunately one is blurry and Trisha quips:

Miley Wannabe *i know you cant tell, but these boots have fringe on them. Yikes!*

Now considering this is coming from a woman who has a photo of herself posted on her twitter in a black dress that appears to have a white seafood bib tucked in as a collar I'd suggest she has little room to judge anyone's fashion choices. I mean really, she'd be laughed out of any decent establishment in Paris, except maybe Maison Prunier where they'd probably still snicker a little but at least assume she came prepared for a lobster dinner.

Even further beyond the pale is a very clear photo of a girl who appears to be a mere 15 or 16 years old, a minor, with this caption:

BUT THIS ONE gets to me. This girl is approximately 15.

She could in fact be younger.

She has braces, chubby face, blah blah, but she is FAT. Why are kids this overweight? It’s not like she has birthed four kids.

WTF is the excuse for this?

If someone responds and tells me she has a thyroid problem, Im going to hurl on myself.

This girl needs to lay off the ho-ho’s before she ends up on someones blog…

oh…

too late.

OK Trisha, as a parent I'm sure you'd be not only mortified but angry if someone took a photo of your daughter, posted it online without your permission or knowledge, and criticized her chubby arms and face. I would imagine that anger would be compounded if it was suggested that perhaps she took after her mom who was recently told by her doctor she could stand to lose a few pounds herself. Honestly though, how it got to the point where a doctor needed to tell her that I don't know...it's clear from photos that second chin appears to be drooping down and those flabby arms could stand a break from the visits to culinary class...just sayin'.

I will admit, the momdot founder and blogger is right about one thing though (from Trisha's twitter):

No one likes me more than I like myself.

Well ain't that the truth?



The post that inspired this blog can be found here:

http://www.momdot.com/airportpeople